Ditching The Sexy Shoes

shoepic These shoes are gorgeous, aren’t they? I bought them four years ago, and I think I’ve worn them two, maybe three times…once or twice to practice walking in them, and once for an outing that only required me to make my way from the car to my seat at the venue and back.

I’ve had girlfriends ask why the heck I don’t wear the shoes; my kids have asked why I buy shoes like that if they just sit in my closet. They’re great questions, and they definitely made me consider the answers. These are some hella sexy shoes, but the thing is, they’re also just not me. Which begs the question, why did I buy them?

I think I bought them because what girl doesn’t like shoes, right? And I mean, they’re super cute…but I think more than anything, I liked the idea of having these shoes. My social media feed is filled with women sporting five inch heels of every color and pattern (walking flawlessly, I might add), looking amazing, and I bought into the idea that in order to look and feel that good about myself as a woman, I needed to have THESE SHOES.

But like I said, the five inch heels aren’t my bag. I can’t walk in them for one thing (no, really…it’s not pretty), and when my feet hurt, I start feeling a little stabby. I’m more of a casual girl. I work at home and wear workout gear 80% of the time, and when I do put grown-up clothes on, it’s usually jeans and Converse or a comfy, stretchy dress and ballet flats. A designer handbag is about as fancy as I get (not gonna lie, I do love me some Louis).

What I’ve learned after years of trying to mold myself into the person I thought I should be (and look like) is that the comparison game is impossible to win. There’s no joy in embracing a standard you can never live up to. And besides, life’s too short to try and live it someone else’s way. My new mantra: DO YOU.

So, I’m ditching the heels. They need to go, along with anything else in my closet that doesn’t allow me to exhale when I wear it. I’m letting go of everything that doesn’t bring me joy. What about you? Are there things in your closet (or your life) that you need to let go of to be happier? Hit me up in the comments! I wanna hear all about it!

Blessings, Love, & Light,


P.S. If you’re looking for a supportive community of women to connect with, I invite you to join my FREE, private Facebook group! We share ideas on self-care, self-love, how to add more joy to your life, and be the happiest, hottest, healthiest version of YOU! Join us!



Against The Grind

Riseand grindI can’t say I personally knew a ton of female business owners when I started my first venture several years ago. It certainly didn’t seem like girls were exactly running the world, and the term ‘Girl Boss’ wasn’t even a thing yet.  But in those first few months after starting my business, because of social media I was able to find and follow a few other women who were doing their own thing and setting an example for those of us who were new to the game.

And follow them I did–coaches, writers, consultants, inventors; you name it. I watched their videos, read their blog posts, and followed them on Twitter and Facebook. I devoured every crumb of wisdom that trailed behind them in hopes of learning what it took to get ahead, do it all, and make it werk.

At the time, I needed all the help I could get! In addition to running a start-up, I was a wife, a mom to two ‘tween girls, was doing some freelance writing, had gone back to school full time, had relocated half-way across the country nine months before, and our family’s sole source of income was my husband’s own company that was not even a year old at that point. My plate wasn’t just full, it was piled to the ceiling.

Over the course of a few years, I transitioned to a coaching business that continues to evolve and expand all the time (yep, that first biz venture failed miserably). Along the way, I’ve seen the number of female entrepreneurs in the fields related to mine rise exponentially. Their successes have motivated and inspired me to follow my own curiosity, creativity and passion.

What hasn’t been so inspiring though, is the change in energy I’ve noticed in my collective social media newsfeeds. Facebook and Instagram have become overrun with ‘Rise and Grind’ memes and “motivational” posts about respecting the hustle. Um…did I miss something? Because I thought becoming a Boss Lady was all about living your life by design. I thought it was about doing what brings you joy and aligns with your purpose. Maybe I’m getting caught up in the language, but the whole reason I’m on this entrepreneurial path is because I don’t want my life to be a grind, and I don’t wanna hustle for anyone.

Yes, in business (and in life) there are times you have to do things you don’t necessarily feel like doing. But if your biz is starting to feel like something you need to psych yourself up for, maybe it’s time to rethink things a little bit. If the entrepreneurial path is like a river, you basically have two choices: you can get in your boat and paddle against the current, grinding and hustling your way up stream; or you can drop the paddles altogether, flow with it, and enjoy the ride. I don’t know about you, but I’m down for option two.